It is usual for women to experience mixed emotions, so it is reasonable when you encounter an unfortunate situation that involves a conflict with someone. It is inevitable, and it happens almost all the time. But in some circumstances, there is a certainty that you sometimes cannot control yourself. There are instances that instead of trying to patch things up with someone you have had a misunderstanding with, you choose not to resolve the issue. Perhaps maybe because you get emotionally attached to the problem and that all you can think of is getting back on that person. But do you entirely need that to happen?
Always The First Option
One of the unfortunate things when it comes to women’s misunderstanding is that blaming each other becomes the first option. Considering the situation, it becomes a habit of most women not to take things slowly, especially when it is all about an argument. With that, they begin to lose control and become bias on their judgment. Admit it, when you realize that an absolute misunderstanding is not entirely your fault, you grew more disgust on the other person. You begin to look at all the damages she caused you. And by all means, you start to think that all the humiliation, pain, and stress that the whole things caused you is enough for you to take matters in your hand. Joyce Marter, LCPC says, “Imagine you are viewing the conflict from a neutral place at a greater distance.” She adds, “Are you really upset about the issue at hand or are you displacing your anger?”
Honestly, women are forgiving. However, when it comes to bits of indifferences with another woman, she becomes eager to become an alpha. With that kind of mentality, there is a tendency that instead of fixing things, one of the other wants drama. In instances like this, perhaps you are familiar. Let us assume you are the one who seems a bit distant with reconciliation. Not all the time, though. But it is guaranteed that you will target your enemy’s weak points in her personality. With that, you will look more into her flaws. You will start attacking her below the belt only because you want to prove your worth. You will become more entitled to your current status and privileges that the other does not have. “Women often exhibit more indirect ways of expressing their anger like passive-aggressive behavior. She will not get mad at you directly but indirectly.” says Audrey Nelson Ph.D.
You Are Destroying Yourself
Women should empower each other as much as possible. So the moment you tried targeting her personality, you are also destroying yourself. “Women who view every other woman’s actions as a threat create an atmosphere charged with negative competition,” Suzanne Deges-White, Ph.D., LPC, LMHC, NCC wrote. “The fear that someone else is going to take what is due to you can create a toxic environment for those who work with or around you.” Not because you get to be more talented, prettier, or smarter than the other woman, that does not give you the privilege to be on top of her. Both of you are equal in the same way regardless of what skills, beauty, and intelligent you have. There is no such thing as “I am much better” when it comes to misunderstandings and conflict.
The next time you face a predicament with some woman, never assume that you are above her. Never attempt to destroy her, insult her, and hurt her just because you think you deserve to do it. Keep in mind that the more you try ruining her, the more you destroy yourself.